Alex loves that baby in the mirror and like all worthwhile or interesting objects, they simply must end up in your mouth. Her reflection was no exception.
Gymnastics
Hidden way back in what seems to be an empty lot, behind a local car garage and teaming sports bar lies a place where future Olympians train in pursuit of their gold medal dreams. We were lucky enough as a Young Women's group to get the opportunity to play on some of their equipment after classes were over for the day in exchange for some of our help in cleaning up the place. Apparently, they must get this offer a lot because the place was spotless, having just been cleaned the day before by another group of jungle gym junkies looking for some free entertainment. It also doesn't hurt when you conveniently forget all of your cleaning supplies back at the church. So the kind inn keepers forgave our debt and allowed us to go straight for the equipment.
Nothing is so thrilling than to feel like a kid again as you bounce effortlessly down a padded run way. However, nothing is quite so humbling as when you reach the end of that run way and suddenly realize as you jump that you have no training as to what to do with your body once it is airborne. You contemplate as you soar awkwardly through the air that maybe you didn't think this through while the ground draws steadily nearer until you land abruptly in a heap.
Should you decide to pick yourself up and attempt similar acrobatics on other pieces of equipment, you may well be surprised to find that the end results share a similar theme. Turns out gymnastics is hard. Balance beams are high, especially when you are 6'3". Pomell horses are impossible. Trying to overcome gravity on the uneven bars was simply not achievable, and I didn't even try the rings. I did, however, win a hand stand contest on the mat, which turned out to be a much safer place for me to experiment.
If all this isn't enough fun for you there is always the giant pit of foam. Do not be fooled by it's common place appearance. This pit is five feet deep and swallows it captives whole.
For some this is a place for dreams, for me it was a place where I realized my own inadequacies after being bested by nearly every thing in the place. Nevertheless, it is still a giant jungle gym filled with adult sized toys and I still left feeling younger with a smile on my face and a bounce in my step. (it is hard to stop after stepping off of those springy floors) A slightly more bruised self, with one additional blister than I had before, but still delighted.
Here are some pictures of our girls and their efforts at the gym. Although they appear to be in dire straights, they do in fact land quite safely on the other side.
Hogle Zoo
There is a magical place where for the exchange of money they will let you view exotic animals. We had a great time at the zoo with fellow zoo attendees Rob, Maren, and Emery. Here are some of the animals we saw.
Monkeys (Monkies?? How do you pluralize monkeyz? Moose. Meese?)
More monkeys.
A peacock who seemed to have earned the freedom to wander freely around the zoo as it made its appearance in multiple other exhibits throughout the day. (He must have paid the admission fee too)
Elephants
This is a close up of what is actually going on behind Alex in the above picture. Does this not seem cruel to place the sweet elephants food way up high so that we get to gasp at how long and dexterous their trunks are as they reach for every bite? It was pretty cool though.
A shot of an elephant who has been severely neglecting her moisturizing regimen.
An elephant without a trunk.
An equal opportunity horse.
A horse with osteoporosis and mange.
The cutest animal in the park. (I wanted to run through a grassy green meadow with this little fella)
Lance's favorite monkey.
The Missing Link.
Giraffes. Our kindred spirits of the animal world. Quiet, unassuming, gentle giants.
Slightly less cruel than the elephants, these giraffes are also required to reach for their food.
This one took a shine to Lance and made her intentions known in the following video. I put a quick stop to that. (harlot)
Mother's Day
On this Mother's Day, I received a new spicy red digital camera as Lance's gift of love. It has lots of fancy features a few of which are the capacity to film in HD, zoom in and out without losing quality, and not requiring 15 minutes to take a picture. I mean no disrespect to the iphone, our previous makeshift camera. It really is quite amazing in every other possible way, but in the photography department it is found somewhat wanting in the basic need to take a picture. Since this seems to be the basic function of a camera, we opted for a better solution, enter the Kodak Easyshare.
Here is the first video we took. Yes, I am in my fluffy pink bathrobe, another gift of love from Lance, which signifies my lack of getting ready for the day. I apologize in advance for you having to see me pre-morning transformation, especially when, as I stated before, the footage is in HD, but I might as well tell you all my little secret. I don't roll out of bed freshly pressed and glowing with radiant beauty. With that off my chest, here is the unsightful clip.
Alex had as much fun with the bag the camera came in as I did with the actual camera. (Shellie, you might recognize the bag since Lance used it again to present you with your gift)
Here is a slight redemption at my appearance. Thank you Abbie, you are an excellent photographer.
This one I took just for fun.
With power like this in my hands, why I could blast off in a rocket ship to the stars.
Lance's edit:
The camera does indeed shoot 720p hd video and while it's not unbelievable quality, it's definitely not the crap you see in the video above. Blogger re-encodes the video when you post it just so you know. The inner geek in me had to clarify this point. But it truly is powerful enough to blast you off in a rocket ship to the stars. (this last phrase can be used after absolutely any sentence as evidenced by the narrator of the last event we filmed; bless her heart)
Golfing with Dad
Occasionally after mowing our unusually large back yard with our equally small push lawn mower, Lance feels entitled to then benefit from his labors and take advantage of our lawn's abnormal size by working on his game. Golfing that is. The distance from our back porch to our tree line makes for a decent chipping distance, and the lack of an actual hole is replaced by aiming at various objects of size and states of life. Alex likes to participate as well, though she put no effort into the actual mowing of the lawn. (mooch)
She does, however, pull her weight through her excellent work as a caddy. While her suggestions have not as of yet taken any strokes off Lance's game, they have managed to keep several holes out of our neighbor's fences. (you're welcome)
We are looking to go Pro as soon as they create an PGA tournament that caters to infants. Alex can't wait to meet Tiger Woods.
Under the Sea
Yes, Utah does have an Aquarium. The Living Planet Aquarium is located in Salt Lake and has a special half price deal during certain hours on Monday evenings. Always a sucker for a deal and thinking that somehow watching fish would make a great family night, we headed off.
They had a fish petting zoo where you could reach your arm in and try to touch this

If I am not mistaken, this is the same animal that very tradgically killed the crododile hunter is it not? It would certainly be my first choice of what to put in a child's petting zoo as well.

And here is Alex getting her turn to cheat death. Thankfully her arms are too short to do much more than spalsh her neighbors. (Lest you be too afraid, I think they remove the stingers of these stingrays and they are therefore no longer lethal, but rather delightfully soft/slimy. I also mean no disrespect to the crocodile hunter or his family, and only make mention of him to show that these things can in fact be dangerous and not make light of his death. I was just trying to be funny. So on to more jokes that I will feel guilty about later and feel the need to correct. Guilt complexes don't go well with trying to be a comedian.)
Here is a list of some of the other things we saw. They had:
poison things (these were safely behind glass)

spiky things

slimy things

They had a fish petting zoo where you could reach your arm in and try to touch this
If I am not mistaken, this is the same animal that very tradgically killed the crododile hunter is it not? It would certainly be my first choice of what to put in a child's petting zoo as well.
And here is Alex getting her turn to cheat death. Thankfully her arms are too short to do much more than spalsh her neighbors. (Lest you be too afraid, I think they remove the stingers of these stingrays and they are therefore no longer lethal, but rather delightfully soft/slimy. I also mean no disrespect to the crocodile hunter or his family, and only make mention of him to show that these things can in fact be dangerous and not make light of his death. I was just trying to be funny. So on to more jokes that I will feel guilty about later and feel the need to correct. Guilt complexes don't go well with trying to be a comedian.)
Here is a list of some of the other things we saw. They had:
poison things (these were safely behind glass)
spiky things
slimy things
reptile things

And throughout it all being the perpetual germaphobe that I am, I followed Alex around with a wet wipe and tried to keep her from sucking on the glass. However, we did have a good time and are now slightly more educated. Good family night.
and things that should have been left on the bottom of the ocean (tell me you don't have nightmares about being sucked down by one of these)

And throughout it all being the perpetual germaphobe that I am, I followed Alex around with a wet wipe and tried to keep her from sucking on the glass. However, we did have a good time and are now slightly more educated. Good family night.
Making New Friends
Where have the days gone where we didn't have these pesky personal boundries and the best way to get to know someone new was to get right up in their face and simply stare. This is a step back into those simpler, happier times. Here's to making new friends.
Special thanks to new friend Ella and her mom Amber. I think they really hit it off.
Outside is Awesome
The weather has finally warmed up a bit, and to celebrate we took Alex to the park. We began humbly, bundled up in the carseat, content to be entertained by watching Lance play tennis.

For a lover of physical comedy, this sight was hilarious.

She thought it was so funny that Lance decided to include her in the action, and the tennis game turned into baby Wimbledon.

Baby tennis turned out to be a hit. Each time Lance or Rob would hit the tennis ball, the babies would go into histarics. And so a new sport has emerged.
Next it was on to the playground, which turns out to be much more fun if you can walk. However, it was delightfully dirty, which for Alex meant plenty of new things to taste which also managed to successfully sick me out.

Emery touched poop (poop pictured below) and was quickly captured for decontamination.
An innocent shoulder ride which turned into a baby chicken fight with Aunt Maren and Cousin Emery. Of course. Why wouldn't it.
For a lover of physical comedy, this sight was hilarious.
She thought it was so funny that Lance decided to include her in the action, and the tennis game turned into baby Wimbledon.
Baby tennis turned out to be a hit. Each time Lance or Rob would hit the tennis ball, the babies would go into histarics. And so a new sport has emerged.
Next it was on to the playground, which turns out to be much more fun if you can walk. However, it was delightfully dirty, which for Alex meant plenty of new things to taste which also managed to successfully sick me out.
Emery touched poop (poop pictured below) and was quickly captured for decontamination.
Who doesn't love a good swing?
An innocent shoulder ride which turned into a baby chicken fight with Aunt Maren and Cousin Emery. Of course. Why wouldn't it.
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